WOLF GUY (1975) Blu-ray review

Wolf Guy (1975) d. Yamaguchi, Kazuhiko (Japan) (1st viewing) 86 min

In this bizarre mixture of horror, action, sexploitation, and sci-fi, international superstar Sonny Chiba (Japan’s answer to Bruce Lee) is a cop who is also the only surviving member of a clan of ancient werewolves who relies on his supernatural powers to solve crimes! (After watching Teen Wolf and Teen Wolf Too, I’m starting to think that werewolves were the original superheroes – they’re able to box, play basketball, sleuth, pretty much anything!)

TEEN WOLF TOO (1987) Blu-ray review

Teen Wolf Too (1987) d. Leitch, Christopher (USA) (1st viewing) 95 min

Or "Teen Wolf As Well," as we used to call it back in the day. The premise for this terrible, strained, not-funny wannabe sequel is that Jason Bateman plays Scott Howard, the similarly afflicted cousin of Michael J. Fox’s character from Teen Wolf annnnnnnnd, yep, that’s the plot. Screenwriter Tim Kring bizarrely brings back the characters of Coach Finstock (who coached basketball in high school and now is coaching college… boxing?) and party boy Stiles (both played by different actors?) and basketball teammate Chubby (again played by Mark Holton, aka "Francis" from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure). James Hampton returns as Bateman’s amiable uncle, while John Astin and Kim Darby cash their checks as the college dean and a strict but sympathetic professor, respectively.

TEEN WOLF (1985) Blu-ray review

Teen Wolf (1985) d. Daniel, Rod (USA) (2nd viewing) 92 min

A few months after Michael J. Fox became a movie star with Back to the Future, this innocuous high-concept vehicle also hit screens, spinning the comic fable of a befuddled high school basketball player “going through some changes.” It’s all pretty much by-the-numbers teen comedy, with awesome character man James Hampton (The Longest Yard) stealing every scene as Fox’s doldrums dad. Legendary makeup man Tom Burman (Food of the Gods, Halloween III) handles the latex and fur (although, am I the only one who thinks that our hero looks more like a yeti than a wolfman?), while the devastatingly awful synth score comes courtesy of the late Miles Goodman.

31 (2016) movie review

31 (2016) d. Zombie, Rob (USA) (1st viewing)

Kicking the Seat podcast mogul Ian Simmons approached me with the notion of checking out the latest from Mr. Dragula Himself as a means of a) kicking off the Halloween season and b) maintaining our ongoing patronage of the ever-polarizing horror writer/director. (As documented in 2013’s review of The Lords of Salem, I find myself more and more to be a fan of the artist while not really enjoying the art itself.)

RED RIDING HOOD (2011) movie review

Red Riding Hood (2011) d. Hardwicke, Catherine (USA) (1st viewing) 100 min

Yes, it’s a spin on the classic fairy tale... as told by the director of Twilight. Trust me, those words also struck dread into my blood-lovin’ heart, but I had stumbled upon one of those fabled “best werewolf movies” lists on the wild, wild west that we know as the Interwebs and it had been mentioned favorably and I’m on a little werewolf kick right now and I didn’t HATE the two Twilight movies I saw and the cast included Amanda Seyfried, Gary Oldman, Virginia Madsen, Lukas Haas, and Julie Christie, so....

LYCAN (2017) DVD review

Lycan (2017) d. Land, Bev (USA) (1st viewing) 98 min

Six high schoolers in Talbot County, GA, assigned to “rediscover a moment in history” for a class project, head off into the woods in search of a local legend about a werewolf. Set in 1986 (presumably to eliminate the presence of cell phones and the internet) and populated with attractive young people who occasionally take their clothes off, it’s clear that writer/director Land knows his target audience. The cinematography and sound design are proficient enough for a presumably humble budget, and there are a couple of snazzy horror moments (the shot of a girl being spirited away from her tent is both simple and shocking, and there’s an interesting twist heading into the third act) even as the clichés run fast and furious.

Fool's Views (9/1 – 9/30)

Greetings, autumnal ones!

Considering how crazed I’ve felt over the past month, it’s bewildering that September allowed for as many flicks as it did. I chalk it up to the pressure of having rented most of this month’s offerings from the public library (12 in total) and thereby having an imposed deadline in which to watch them, as well as the pleasant prodding of Kicking the Seat’s Ian Simmons with whom I shared another three horror viewings. The end results included a trio of directors’ festivals (Akira Kurosawa, Peter Berg, Alex Cox) and a werewolf double feature inspired by my current onstage exploits (The Man-Beast at First Folio Theatre, opening next weekend just in time for the full moon).

But the October Horror Movie Challenge (and SCARE-A-THON 2017) looms nigh, so let’s get these in the books and head off into the cornfield mazes!

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

SCARE-A-THON 2017 - FINAL GIRLS FIGHT BACK!!!

Hello, friends and fellow fiends! It’s that time of year again, when shadows grow deeper, sweet tooths grow longer, and helpless pumpkins quake in fear....

It’s time for SCARE-A-THON 2017.

As faithful readers know, for the past several years I have dedicated my October viewing energies to various organizations deserving of some TLC (Terror Lovin’ Care). Thanks to generous, like-minded souls, we have raised thousands of dollars for over two dozen different groups. This year, I have selected the American Women's Self Defense Association, dedicated to "creating a safer society in which all women learn practical and effective self-defense skills" and IMPACT Chicago, which "teaches self-defense to women and girls so they can prevent, minimize, and stop violence."

Because everyone deserves to feel safe and empowered. Now more than ever.

Fool's Views (7/1 – 8/31)

Yep, it’s another 2-months-for-1, which not coincidentally at all cover the rehearsal and performance dates of Oak Park Festival Theatre’s boisterous and crowd-pleasing production of Thomas Heywood’s The Fair Maid of the West. (See trailer HERE.) Between early mornings at the health club and late nights slinging steel (and trying to catch up on sleep whenever possible), there remained precious little time to sit in front of the flickering image. Well, and stay conscious, that is. Many was the time that I passed out 10 minutes in and had to rewind/resume later.

That said, I was relatively pleased with the ground covered by the 19 films below, though it quickly becomes obvious to anyone with half an eye that my attention was placed clearly in the civilian quarter. No apologies, especially since October is only a few weeks away, although I heartily regret choosing Tank 432 out of the dozens of screeners I had on the docket. Ben Wheatley may be a dandy director, but he’s already blown his rep as far as executive producing goes.

Anyway, I will be keeping these trim and lean, since we’ve already got rehearsals for another show on the horizon (The Man-Beast at First Folio Theatre) and the clock is ticking for the annual Scare-A-Thon and October Horror Movie Challenge. Seems like only a year ago....

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

Fool's Views (6/1 – 6/30)

And we’re halfway through the year!

Considering that we’re just about on pace with last year’s totals, it’s shaping up to be another less-than-average year for the Doc, numbers-wise – a tally that was not helped by a cinema-free week in Colorado visiting Mom and the dogs (turkeys, chickens, random elk, etc). But in terms of entertainment quality, I’d say we’ve been doing all right. Granted, this month’s horror totals were decidedly down, but we did manage some worthwhile Civilian first-time views (and revisits), as well as delving into several bona-fide classics from the Kurosawa Kanon.

We’re about to head into rehearsals for Oak Park Festival Theatre’s production of Fair Maid of the West, which might stymie my couch time considerably (see Jan/Feb from earlier this year), but we’ll keep struggling through, my friends. After all, these movies aren’t going to watch themselves, amirite???

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

CATHY'S CURSE (1977) Blu-ray Review

Cathy’s Curse (1977) d. Eddy Matalon (France/Canada)

Shot in Canada during the tax shelter years (and released the same year as David Cronenberg’s Rabid), this bizarre French-produced Omen/Exorcist knock-off centers around the spirit of a young girl – who died decades earlier in an automobile accident with her father – possessing the body of a young couple’s daughter after they move into the family estate. You see, the husband (Alan Scarfe) is the younger brother of the girl who died, and just to stir the pot, did I mention his wife is recovering from a mental breakdown?

Fool's Views (5/1 - 5/31)

The rush to find good seats for Turkey Day gets more challenging every year!

Greetings, my friends!

Well, life returned to semi-normal, following the whirlwind world tour that was April. In fact, the biggest difference was that due to the femalien having a mite bit of knee surgery (nothing serious and completely planned), she was required to spend time on the couch in the evenings so that she could use her passive-motion machine to keep any scar tissue from building up. And, well, if you’re going to be spending time on the couch, you might as well be watching movies, right? As a result, I think she watched more movies this past month than she might have in the previous six, including many of those listed below and a couple more on her own! Who knows, maybe she’ll get her own blog started before long.

This past month also marked our 3rd Annual Turkey Day in May (held, as tradition dictates, in the Kryptic Konfines) with plenty of delicious homemade pizzas and terrible/terribly entertaining films enjoyed alongside my fellow bold and brain-dead pals. Among them being Hellbent for Horror's Scott Bradley, who flew all the way from San Francisco to join the festivities, thereby stealing the crown from Hidden Horror contributor Craig J. Clark for "Furthest Distance Traveled for Turkey." Believe it or not, the lovely bride was even in attendance for the first time ever - we were wondering if Hell was going to freeze over or if her head would explode, but neither occurred. Miracles never cease.

Crammed in five more Kurosawa efforts, as well as an assortment of “hey, I’ve never seen that and hey, there it is on the library shelf” (Cast Away, Muppet Treasure Island, Man of La Mancha, although the latter was also tied into my ongoing Peter O’Toole festival, which may be losing steam – we shall see.)

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

WILLARD (1971) Blu-ray Review

Willard (1971) d. Mann, Daniel (USA)

Bruce Davison stars as the title character, a shy and awkward young man slaving away in the factory office under the thumb of his bullying ogre of a boss (Ernest Borgnine, superb) who stole the business away from Willard’s father. To make matters worse, he has no real friends except those of his batty bedridden mother (Elsa Lanchester) and spends his spare time waiting on her and/or making repairs on their crumbling abode. But Willard’s life takes a dramatic turn when he discovers a nest of rats living in the backyard, especially once he discovers that they can be tamed and trained to perform certain simple tasks... like infiltrating his boss’ dinner party or assisting in petty thievery.

Fool's Views (4/1 – 4/30)

Howdy, folks,

Wow, what a weird month April was! Saw over 50 films, but most of those were within the space of 11 days, the 9 days that comprised BIFFF 2017 and the in-flight movies to and from Brussels. Decidedly feast and famine, but the end results were mighty satisfying overall, a delightful counterpoint to the film-free days the femalien and I spent strolling along the waterways of Paris and Bruges celebrating our ninth year of wedded bliss.

Managed to knock out a couple more Kurosawa flicks along the way, thanks to the good old Chicago Public Library, as well as a “comfort food” viewing of Planet Terror, a shut-your-brain-off flick if ever there was one.

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

BIFFFF 2017 Wrap-up!

Well, BIFFF 2017 has come and gone, and a glorious experience it was.

This marked my third visit to Brussels for the fest, as well as my first time serving on the jury of an international film festival. I was honored to lead the 7th Orbit Jury, filled out by my illustrious compatriots, actress Bénédicte Philippon, radio personality Lucile Poulain, and writer/director Xavier Seron.

There were fewer jaw-dropping celebrity encounters compared to my visits in 2012 (Barbara Steele, Terry Gilliam, William Friedkin) and 2013 (Dario Argento, John Hough), but I was still happy to have rubbed shoulders with directors Fabrice du Welz (Calvaire, Vinyan) and Stanley Tong (Supercop, Rumble in the Bronx), and the lovely Spanish actress Macarena Gomez (Dagon, Witching and Bitching). Due to my late arrival, I just missed meeting 2017’s inductees into the Order of the Raven (the BIFFF’s Hall of Fame), Chan-wook Park (Oldboy, Stoker) and Alejandro Amenabar (The Others, Open Your Eyes).

Edith Scob, the star of the original 1960 shocker Eyes without a Face, was also supposed to be on hand but had to bow out at the last minute due to illness.

As with my previous visits, I spent my downtime camped out in the abode of Brussels blood brother and Cult Reviews mastermind Gert Verbeeck, although our separate trajectories – he was handling a healthy portion of the subtitling programming throughout the fest while I was attending to my jury duties and trying to catch as many other features as possible – did not allow us to spend as much time sitting side by side amidst the raucous BIFFF crowds. Still, it was nice to know that we were both playing important roles in the festival this time around.

Announcing Swiss Army Man as the winner of the 7th Orbit, with Saving Sally receiving a Special Mention

Fool's Views (3/22 - 3/31)

You're going to need a bigger pigpen....

Back again so soon...?

Here's the second half of March's Views, which featured a little double feature from Peter O'Toole. In looking back over the star's filmography, I was surprised at how many duds he had following his 1960-early 70s heyday, and by the time 1982 rolled around (20 years after Lawrence of Arabia made him a household name), many people assumed he was more or less playing himself in My Favorite Year, i.e. a washed up movie star riding on booze, goodwill, and fond memories.

With BIFFF right around the corner, I'm planning to knock out a couple more Kurosawa flicks, and then dive headlong into the Brusselian madness which starts April 8 and which I'm planning to document as thoroughly as possible because who knows when we'll pass this way again. So, don't go too far because it's about to get loopy up in here.

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

Fool's Views (3/1 - 3/21)

Hey there!

As mentioned in the previous post, 2017 got off to a pretty rocky start, but once my stage obligations were concluded, I found myself with a bit more spare time and inspiration to enjoy the moving image once again. (Just in the nick of time, since I’ll be heading off to Belgium in a week to partake in my third go-round of the Brussels International Fantastic Film Festival aka BIFFF, where I’ll probably consume more flicks over the course of 10 days than in the previous three months.)

In addition to a quartet of Blu-ray screeners from Shout! Factory and Severin, I actually got to the cinema on four separate occasions and batted 1.000 right down the line: Get Out, Raw, Logan, and a midnight screening of Razorback at the Music Box Theatre. Plus, for the first time since November’s Turkey Day, a group of the fear-loving faithful gathered at Kitley’s Krypt to partake in some long overdue Sharing and Scaring.

I also decided to make Akira Kurosawa my dedicated “director project” for 2017 (previous subjects include David Cronenberg, Robert Altman, Robert Aldrich, and Alfred Hitchcock), so I kicked things off with a revisit of Ran, and first time viewings of Drunken Angel and The Hidden Fortress. It’s going to be a good year, methinks.

In fact, March was so bountiful, I’m going to break this installment of the Views into two parts. So, stay tuned!

As always, feel free to leave your two cents worth – we’ll make sure you get some change back.

Enjoy!

DREAMSCAPE (1984) Blu-ray review

Dreamscape (1984) d. Ruben, Joseph (USA)

Dennis Quaid stars as a psychic who primarily uses his brainwave powers for picking winners at the race track until former mentor Max von Sydow tracks him down and blackmails him into joining a top-secret government project where he can enter people’s subconscious through their dreams with a little help from beepy and flashy technology. But, as with any good top-secret government project, he quickly learns that all positive creations can be turned to evil ends....

POLTERGEIST II: THE OTHER SIDE (1986) Blu-ray review

Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986) d. Gibson, Brian (USA)

“They’re baaa-aaaack.” The highly unoriginal tagline packs a fraction of the chills of Poltergeist’s “They’re heeeee-ere,” which is about the size of things in this half-baked, money-chasing follow-up. Gone are the rollercoaster thrills, taut direction, and cohesive screenplay Tobe Hooper and Steven Spielberg brought to 1982’s haunted house extravaganza, leaving C-list director Gibson with a game cast and a gamier storyline.

Fool's Views (1/1 - 2/28)

My name is Inigo Drago. You killed my brother. Prepare to die.

Howdy, folks.

Wow, what the hell happened, AC?

So, here’s the story: In late December, I started rehearsals for a new play (an adaptation of Rafael Sabatini’s Captain Blood) with First Folio Theatre, my first time on the boards since embarking on my newfound career as a personal trainer in late 2015. I was thrilled to be given the opportunity to run around in fancy duds, playing a scurrilous plantation owner with a penchant for flogging in the first act and then buckling the swash as an underdressed pirate in the second.

Putting the AC in bACkstabbing since 1685

However, the trade-off for having a full-time job as a trainer means that a show is suddenly (gasp!) a second job. Now, I’m not complaining – I know that plenty of my colleagues do the day-job thing and work their asses off doing play after play and it’s just a way of life for them. I’m just saying that I hadn’t done it myself in quite a while and it was a bit of a shock to the system, especially when my day started at 4:30am and often didn’t end until midnight. It’s a good thing I was having a good time doing burning both candle ends, or I’m not sure I would have made it through.