LOWLIFE (2012) review

Lowlife (2012) (1st viewing) d. Smith, Seth (Canada)

A film that defiantly resists categorization or even a simple plot synopsis, this experimental horror effort evokes the spirit of David Lynch by way of William S. Burroughs, with a little of Lars von Trier shaken over for flavor. An unemployed social outcast (Chik White) spends his days drifting from one starfish emission-induced hallucinogenic trip to the next, attempting to emotionally connect with his similarly addicted sometimes companion Darcy Spidle. But reality has no place in this world where deified animals speak in garbled, subtitled tones and goo-dripping mud men appear in the unlikeliest of places. Fiercely original and filled with potent imagery, but perhaps a shade long for the fever dream it is. Or maybe the excessive length is all part of Smith’s discomfiting plan. I just know that coming at the end of a long day, I was admiring the artist while begging for release from the art.

SUSHI GIRL (2012) review

Sushi Girl (2012) (1st viewing) d. Saxton, Kern (USA)

Six years after a diamond heist goes sour, crime boss Tony Todd marks the prison release of Noah Hathaway (the lone arrest made) with a special old team reunion to answer a few questions about what went wrong, a gathering whose centerpiece involves seafood delicacies served off lovely Cortney Palm’s prone naked body. Director Saxton has assembled a notably unconventional and skilled cast that includes not only Todd (who exec-produced) and Neverending Story alumnus Hathaway, but James Duval, Andy Mackenzie, Michael Biehn, Jeff Fahey, Danny Trejo, Sonny Chiba, and casting coup non pareil, Mark Hamill as a fey psycho whose stringy locks bring to mind ’70s era Paul Williams on a really bad day. Watching this venerable team of underrated talents square off should be entertainment enough for most, but the ultimate equation is less than the sum of its parts. Clearly Saxton and co-writer Destin Pfaff have a deep love for Reservoir Dogs, but stunt casting + ornate production design + nasty torture sequences does not a Tarantino breakout make…especially if the memorably chewy Tarantino dialogue fails to show up (Todd’s ominous “oven timer” monologue notwithstanding). The result is a well-produced film with lofty ambitions, full of sound and fury...that ultimately feels like much ado about nothing.

A LITTLE BIT ZOMBIE (2012) review

Little Bit Zombie, A (2012) (1st viewing) d. Walker, Casey (Canada)

What happens when a mosquito takes a nibble out of a shambling fleshbag? What if a human victim of the ensuing undead insect bite retained his humanity whilst losing his pulse? These are two of the many novel spins on gut-munching lore that first time feature screenwriters Trevor Martin and Christopher Bond have contemplated, and while the humorous scenarios occasionally strain credibility, there’s little denying the high spirited approach. Two young white-bread couples (affianced Kristopher Turner and Crystal Lowe, already hitched Shawn Roberts and Kristen Hager) retreat to a wooded cabin for some pre-wedding R&R, a vacation that takes a wicked turn after one quarter of their party starts salivating for gray matter. At the same time, zombie hunters Emilie Ullerup and Stephen McHattie patrol the countryside looking for brainpans to air out. Director Walker and his likeable ensemble (save for Lowe’s by-design love-to-hate-her ballbusting Guidette) energetically trade zingers and physical comedy bits – some work, some don’t, but there’s rarely a dull moment to be found.

DEAD SUSHI (2012) review

Dead Sushi (2012) (1st viewing) d. Iguchi, Noboru (Japan)

“When you insult a sushi chef, the next dish is death!” Shunned by her sushi master father for inferior rice palming skills, spunky Rina Takeda finds employ at a remote country inn the same day a shady pharmaceuticals firm corporate outing arrives on vacation. When a disgruntled employee infects the edibles with an experimental serum, guests and staff alike are besieged by animated appetizers that are fanged and furious. After witnessing the gut-busting, gag-inducing Zombie Ass at BIFFF in April, I was more than willing to return to the table to see what new dish the sensei of splatter had in store. With this latest exaggerated onslaught of pell-mell pandemonium, Iguchi might just have arrived at the perfect recipe of delirious bloodslinging and ridiculous slapstick, his fevered imagination conjuring such never-before-seen (or imagined) sights as a giant flying sushi roll battleship, nunchucks composed of rice and fish slices, and airborne swarms of bite-sized foodstuffs that spit acid, shoot flame and devour human flesh, snickering high-pitched manic giggles all the while. Needless to say, the world premiere Fantasia crowd ate it up (when they weren’t picking jaws up off the floor or turning to their neighbors for confirmation that, yes, they had just seen that) and begged for more. Innocent within its insanity, Dead Sushi brings to mind the organic audaciousness and inspired anarchy of Troma’s salad days and comes highly recommended to share with friends.

THE HAUNTING OF JULIA (1977) review

Haunting of Julia, The (aka Full Circle) (1977) (2nd viewing) d. Loncraine, Richard (UK/Canada)

This exquisite slow burn horror yarn ranks alongside The Changeling and Don’t Look Now as one of the most atmospheric and dread-filled ghost stories; like its cinematic younger sibling, it focuses on the death of the protagonist’s child, shockingly depicted in the opening scene. Here, the traumatized parent is Mia Farrow (at her pallid and stuttering best, in spite of a wavering English accent) who, after being released from a doctor’s care, distances herself from rigid husband Keir Dullea and sets up solitary life in a flat on the outskirts of London. After a larkish dinner party séance turns sinister, Farrow becomes convinced that the spirit of her child is attempting to contact her, but her paranormal investigations reveal something far more macabre. Aided immeasurably by Colin Towns’ spare piano-and-strings score, Loncraine casts a foreboding spell over the proceedings, immersing the viewer in Farrow’s grief and desire to reconnect with her daughter. This empathy makes her (and our) quest for answers to the supernatural mystery, motoring the deliberately paced chiller to a devastating conclusion.

MEMORY OF THE DEAD (2012) review

Memory of the Dead (2012) d. Diment, Valentin Javier (Argentina)

A nonsensical gorefest in same vein of early ’80s Italian horror efforts, this Argentinean occult romp makes next to no narrative sense and should be purely enjoyed for its juicier parts. Seven weeks to the day after her husband’s mysterious death, grieving widow Lola Berthet gathers a select group of friends and family to honor the dead…a reunion that evolves into a sea of vivid sanguinary effects and head-scratching hokum. With homages running rampant (nodding to Evil Dead, The Shining and the aforementioned Fulci flicks) and some impressive emoting occurring throughout, it’s a shame that it’s all being done in the service such incoherent blather. Seriously, I called the logic police about a half dozen times before they took the phone off the hook and left me to muddle through on my own. Switch off your brain and bring your plastic raincoat - you’ve been warned.

CITADEL (2012) review

Citadel (2012) (1st viewing) d. Foy, Ciarán (Ireland/Scotland)

After witnessing a brutal assault on his pregnant wife by a savage gang of hooded youths, Aneurin Barnard finds himself crippled with agoraphobia. Barely able to escape the confines of his dilapidated apartment complex to attend therapy sessions or retrieve food for his newborn daughter, Barnard is haunted by visions of the past, fearing the assailants will return. Return they do, revealing themselves to be more than an underage collective of thugs, but legitimate monsters cut from Cronenberg's Brood cloth and equipped with savage cunning and a perverse agenda. Writer/director Foy pulse-pounding debut is set amidst snow-swept, urban wasteland environs, successfully isolating his protagonists such that terror – ours and his – is felt during both daylight and darkest night. As a gruff priest and sympathetic nurse, James Cosmo and Wunmi Mosaku respectively offer able support, but it’s Barnard and Foy’s show all the way – the director and star ably work in tandem, creating an oppressive atmosphere of tension and despair. Having already racked up multiple audience awards during its brief festival run, this is a bold new voice in horror that I’ll be rooting for and that you will be hearing about.

RESOLUTION (2012) movie review

Resolution (2012) d. Benson, Justin / Moorhead, Aaron Scott (USA) 

Good guy Peter Cilella tracks down ne’er-do-well pal Vinny Curran via an email, video clip and attached GoogleMap, a journey that ends at a deserted shack where Curran seems bent on chemically expediting his shuffle off this mortal coil. Cilella takes it upon himself to forcibly detox his childhood companion courtesy of handcuffs and chain; during the weeklong waiting period, the duo encounter an array of colorful characters and more than a few odd occurrences, including the inexplicable appearances of assorted A/V equipment (VCR, 8mm projector, cassettes, etc.) with increasingly perplexing and foreboding recorded material.

THE PACT (2012) movie review

The Pact (2012) d. McCarthy, Nicholas (USA) 

Newcomer Caity Lotz stars in this good ghost story well told, with bigger names Casper Van Dien and Agnes Bruckner taking smaller roles (and presumably smaller paychecks – one has to wonder what Van Dien saw in what is ultimately a throwaway part). Atmospheric and effective, with minimal, well-executed special effects, a bit of bloodletting and some fine chilling visuals without relying (too) heavily on aural jump scares.

INBRED (2011) movie review

Inbred (2011) d. Chandron, Alex (UK)

A community service outing for juvenile delinquents takes a motley urban band into the back fields of jolly olde England, where they are soon set upon by an uglier, motlier band of locals armed with chainsaws and sharp implements. Pure and simple high energy gory glory, unfettered by pretentions or underlying social commentary, Chandron and his able band of cohorts have nothing on their mind but showering his assembled ensemble with as much of the red stuff in the most mind-shattering, lunch-buckling cinematic manner possible. Mission accomplished, good sir.

PLAY DEAD (2012) movie review

Play Dead (2012) d. Rupe, Shade / Teller (USA) 

Originating as an off-Broadway production, this superb interactive theatrical mélange of murderous tales and ghoulish sleight of hand keeps audiences giggling even as the hairs rise on the backs of their necks. Todd Robbins is our master of ceremonies in this recorded concert-film version of the show, oozing malevolent charm as he guides us through a half dozen tales of serial killers and macabre practitioners, pulling the occasional unwitting individual from the crowd to assist him. Co-written and directed by Teller (of Penn and Teller), then captured on film by Shade Rupe, this is a fun night of fright.

MY AMITYVILLE HORROR (2012) movie review

My Amityville Horror (2012) d. Walter, Eric (USA)

An extraordinary work of investigative vision and grounded restraint, documentarian Walter casts an unflinching yet empathetic gaze upon the most sensational American haunting of the 20th century, but through a lens of humanity that elevates it above its ghost-chasing brethren.

DOOMSDAY BOOK (2012) movie review

Doomsday Book (2012) d. Kim, Jee-woon / Yim, Pil-sung (South Korea)

Most anthology films announce themselves through a wraparound story of some sort, however flimsy or contrived, and are the work of how many ever directors there are stories. But this South Korean horror-sci-fi effort colors outside the established lines, with no connective narrative tissue and two of its three segments directed by a single individual (Pil-sung Yim) with Jee-woon Kim holding down the center slot. These minor breaks with convention are in service of three tales about the way the world ends, and the means by which humanity seems bent on handling the job itself.

V/H/S (2012) movie review

V/H/S (2012) (1st viewing)
d. Bruckner/McQuaid/Swanberg/West/Wingard/Radio Silence (USA)

As evidenced over the years, the horror anthology format is not an easy one to pull off, regardless of the talent involved (hello, The Theatre Bizarre). Meanwhile, the “found footage” milieu has saturated the market over the past decade, a relentlessly problematic cinematic device increasingly employed by no-budget filmmakers who claim to be reflecting our self-absorbed society, but really just don’t feel like building or lighting a set.

MON AMI (2012) movie review

Mon Ami (2012) d. Grant, Rob (Canada)

From our neighbors to the north comes this screamingly funny, gleefully depraved high energy romp that envisions the Coen Brothers’ Fargo through a buddy-comedy prism…then flings it into a kiddie pool of blood. A pair of frustrated home-improvement chain store employees (Mike Kovac, Scott Wallis) concoct a “harmless” kidnapping scheme that spins out of control, setting into motion a chain of increasingly audacious events, each more outrageously irrevocable than the last.

HUMAN RACE, THE (2012) movie review

Human Race, The (2012) d. Hough, Paul (USA)

In a premise resembling a hybrid of Stephen King’s The Long Walk and Battle Royale, a broad racial/cultural cross-section of an unnamed metropolitan populace are spontaneously abducted, reappearing in a bleak and barren landscape save for a sidewalk leading in, around and through a few deserted structures. Then the “rules” start echoing in their heads and it’s every individual for themselves until a single survivor remains.

UNDER THE BED (2012) movie review

Under the Bed (2012) d. Miller, Steven C. (USA)

After being sent away two years prior for burning down their house, troubled teen Jonny Weston returns to live with his father (Peter Holden), younger brother (Gattlin Griffith) and new stepmother (Musetta Vander), but it seems the literal monsters of the past are still present…and hungry. Even if director Miller hadn’t said in his pre-show intro that this was his ode to Spielberg-era kid-horror films like The Goonies and Poltergeist, it’s clear that’s the note he’s striving for from the opening frame. Unfortunately, he’s also clearly interested in doing his version of a Spielberg-era kid-horror film, and like last year’s Super 8, pale imitations – however well intentioned – are no substitute for the real thing.

TOAD ROAD (2012) movie review

Toad Road (2012) (1st viewing) d. Banker, Jason (USA)

Aimless small town stoner James Davidson falls into a romantic entanglement with good girl Sara Jones, a surprise to everyone (not least of all himself). But while he gets high merely to escape a mundane existence, Jones sees within the chemically induced euphoria a “bigger picture,” one that offers a tangibly different plane of existence. Discovering an urban legend about the seven gates of Hell located nearby, she urges the smitten Davidson to help locate them…an expedition that forever alters their relationship.

ISN'T ANYONE ALIVE? (2011) movie review

Isn't Anyone Alive? (2011) d. Ishii, Gakuryu (Japan)

News of a mysterious train crash, where the conductor is suspected of having fallen asleep or died suddenly, reaches a medical college campus. And, as the clock ticks benignly by, students and individuals of all walks start randomly coughing, spasming…and dropping dead. An intriguing concept, but unfortunately, that’s the whole of the film and at 113 minutes, it’s far too long for its slender premise, intriguingly nihilistic though it might be.

ROBO-G (2012) movie review

Robo-G (2012) d. Yaguchi, Shinobu (Japan)

An utterly charming comic yarn about a retired crank of a senior citizen (Shinjiro Igarashi) who becomes the unlikely savior of a group of muddled computer technicians tasked with creating a humanoid robot for an upcoming electronics expo. When their design fails, they recruit Igarashi – despite his age, he fits the existing metal robot frame – but when he instinctively saves a young brainiac from being brained by a falling beam, the faux cyborg becomes an unlikely national hero, and the charade must be sustained indefinitely for (paid) public appearances.