ZONE TROOPERS (1985) Blu-ray Review

Zone Troopers (1985) d. Bilson, Danny (USA) (86 min)

In contrast to this month’s other KRYPTIC ARMY selection, while I had been aware of its indelible box art staring back at me for decades from the VHS shelves, Zone Troopers had never really struck me as “must-see material,” and being that I was never the biggest Empire/Full Moon fan growing up, it was never more than a blip on my radar. However, as the years rolled by and my tastes mellowed, I’ve learned to appreciate and enjoy quite a bit of Charles Band’s output, so it was with a mild degree of optimism that I pulled this one up off the interwebs. Happily, I was not disappointed.

CELLAR DWELLER (1988) / CATACOMBS (1988) Blu-ray Reviews

Cellar Dweller (1988) d. John Carl Buechler (USA)
Catacombs (1988) d. David Schmoeller (USA)

Yet another double pack from Shout! Factory, although unlike their recent, head-scratching pairing of The Outing and The Godsend, at least the two films in question bear the common thread of having been produced by Charles Band’s Empire Pictures during its twilight (aka bankruptcy) era. An amiable monster movie and a convoluted possession tale make for unlikely bedfellows, especially with the muddled and occasionally slapdash storylines and characters that mark both pictures, and the results are as decidedly mixed as one might imagine.

CLASS OF 1984 (1982) Blu-ray Review

Class of 1984 (1982) d. Mark L. Lester (Canada)

Andrew Norris (Perry King), vibrant young music teacher and expectant father, leaves his sleepy Nebraska assignment for the big (unnamed) city, and immediately finds himself in the middle of a war between students and faculty. Of course, it's not the entire student body that's gone bad, just a quintet of bad apples spoiling the bunch, radiating bad karma, intimidation, disdain for order, and violent tendencies in their vicious, entitled wake. Their leader, the charismatic Peter Stegman (Timothy Van Patten), is the worst of the bunch, knowing which strings to pull, which loopholes to use. When Norris pushes for change from his fellow educators, he's met with rueful glances or flat-out "go along to get along" directives. (His closest friend, Terry Corrigan (Roddy McDowall) packs a pistol, a flask of whiskey, and a protective armor of apathy to get through the day and isn't afraid to use any of them should the occasion call for it.) Through a series of harrowing personal attacks, the conflict between Stegman and Norris escalates past the point of detention or a trip to the principal's office - this time, the report cards will be written in blood.